Madonna says ‘bend reality’ and learn bagpipes in six weeks

Madonna and Bagpipes

The Material Girl may have talent, but does she have any sense? Despite the rants of Elton John’s husband Canadian David Furnish, you have to give Madonna credit for her creativity and energy. But suggesting someone can learn the bagpipes in six weeks may be a bit of a stretch.

Recently, British actor James D’Arcy landed the part of King Edward VIII in Madonna’s co-written and directed movie W.E. Part of his duties included playing the bagpipes. Eddie, the Duke of Windsor who gave up the throne for Mrs. Simpson (not Homer’s wife) was a piper. According to a discussion on the BobDunsire forums, he was not an accomplished piper, what with running the realm, chasing Wallis and all the other duties of a king.  However, to truly represent the monarch in the film, D’Arcy was asked to learn the bagpipes.  He was given six weeks.

Give D’Arcy credit. He tried. The first thing his instructor rightly told him was it’s impossible. Maybe in a year he could get a tune down. D’Arcy told Madge who would not take no for an answer. “So I emailed Madonna and said that was the case, and she said ‘OK, fair enough, but I think you should learn to play the bagpipes. Just because somebody says you can’t, it doesn’t mean you have to listen to them”, says D’Arcy. She suggested he “bend reality”.

D’Arcy’s instructor, named John Angus, started the task of bending reality and according to the British actor; he learned “three minutes of bagpipes with all three pipes”. In six weeks! Look out Field Marshall Montgomery!

Unfortunately the scene was cut from the movie.  I don’t think I need to wonder why!

About Mike Chisholm

Official Piper: Rocky Mountaineer Rail Tours. Pitt River Resort. Exec. Dir. ScotFestBC: The British Columbia Highland Games, Director, BC Pipers' Assn. Former journalist, Nova Scotian, Dad.
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1 Response to Madonna says ‘bend reality’ and learn bagpipes in six weeks

  1. P McDonald says:

    The best laid schemes of mice and men gang aft agley!

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